Sweet, merciful crap!

By Nicole Kobie

Don’t be fooled; Sweet November is not a romantic-drama. From the ads and tagline it has such an appearance, but in reality it’s nothing more than laboured fantasy.

Most romantic films are nonsensical, and most of their characters would get arrested for stalking or harassment if they acted that insane off-screen. No one expects mushy movies to be lifelike; they’re expected to be every woman’s fantasy. However, Sweet November takes it too far.

Featuring Keanu Reeves as nasty workaholic Nelson Moss and Charlize Theron as bohemian wacko Sara Deever, Sweet November is the story of their one-month relationship. However as the film staggers on, the characters and the story take more and more steps away from any sense of credibility.

Nelson is an ambitious and talented advertising executive who works too hard and therefore is a jerk. This is the first step in the short trip to complete nonsense.

According to this movie, every hardworking, successful person is an asshole, with the exception of Sara’s housemate, Chad–who is an entirely different story.

Chad is what’s called "comic relief." He’s a homosexual transvestite, complete with green sequined dress. The only reason he dresses like a woman is for the sake of comedy. There’s no underlying reason. Crossdressers everywhere should be insulted, as should the audience for having to watch such useless scenes.

Sara is a concept even less credible than Nelson and Chad. The premise behind her is foolish. Every month she takes a man into her home–and her bed–to "heal" them. October featured a super shy guy who Sara cured fast enough to earn a few weeks off before November when a man known as Nelson arrived.

Right. Random men just dump their lives to spend a month with this woman, who profoundly affects them for the rest of their lives. Oh, and how does she manage this? By running and playing in the sand, by walking dogs, playing silly games and by being a good lay. Are men’s problems that easy to solve?

Sweet November deserves this cynicism. Fluffy movies such as this shouldn’t create such a negative reaction. Romantic movies should make the audience feel sad, inspired or warm and fuzzy. However, Sweet November will only leaving you feeling cold.