To the edge of the world!

By Roman Auriti

There’s a society for every fucked up person with too much time on their hands. There are secret suicide societies, a cacophony society (guess what they do) and even conservative societies. However ridiculous these societies may be, there is one that trumps them all: the Flat Earth Society. The Flat Earth Society is composed of a number of people from all “across” the world who fervently believe that the Earth is a flat disc.

The round Earth versus flat Earth debate should be dead. There’s a reason why humanity hasn’t “rolled” back to an earlier scientific discovery. It’s because every discovery that’s been made has been far more accurate than the last. Case in point: fire, earth, water, air or any combination of these four ancient elements is no longer believed to create everything that we can see, feel or touch. Since the discovery that elements are the actual building blocks of everything, there’s obviously been no point in trying to revert back to what humanity once thought. Now there is a far superior explanation for it.

If the arguments that Flat Earthers’ present were actually substantial, they would be worth their weight in gold. Paraphrasing from the book, 100 Proofs the Earth is Not a Globe, written just over 100 years ago, because the Nile runs for well over a thousand miles and only falls for a total of one foot, it’s reasonable proof that the Earth is not a globe. Flat Earthers also believe that the disc Earth accelerates upwards to simulate the force of gravity and a plethora of bendy light, celestial gears and projections explain why the “southern hemisphere” is able to see the Northern Star.

What’s even more crazy is the basis for the flat Earth theory. According to flat Earth theorists, the NASA photo called “Earthrise” and the moon landing were faked and are nothing more than government conspiracy to brainwash us into thinking that the Earth is round rather than flat.

Any person could distrust any evidence contrary to their beliefs. Why the hell Flat Earthers do is a mystery that probably only one of them could solve (they seem to be good at explaining impossible things).

Fortunately, these people are few and far between, so the chance of encountering one is quite slim. However, in the surreal chance you do, be prepared to run away screaming “the moon landing was real” or tell them that they’re wrong “plane” and simple before they start reciting Rowbotham’s findings. Because once they start rattling off the most recent Flat Earth Theorist’s findings, you’ll soon find yourself helplessly rolling on the floor laughing.

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