By Jeremy Woo
Almost everyone with Internet or cable seems to have an innate fascination with reality television — we thrive on gawking at people in questionable life circumstances. The Learning Channel reality show Here Comes Honey Boo Boo is no exception to this. Alana Thompson, otherwise known as Honey Boo Boo Child, is the star of what I would call the epitome of garbage television.
Considering that this show is a spin off of Toddlers and Tiaras, TLC has truly gone out of their way to further degrade those already in the exploitative child pageant world. Alana’s mother, June, said her family has spent approximately $8,000–9,000 on Honey Boo Boo’s pageants. This cost is offset by “extreme couponing.”
Here Comes Honey Boo Boo should never be watched, even when there is nothing else on TV. The first episode introduces the Thompson/Shannon family, who all have unusual nicknames. In addition, they have a daughter who is pregnant at 17 and all family members struggle with their weight. This follows a trend set by their mother who was pregnant at 15 and currently weighs over 300 pounds. Some may argue that Honey Boo Boo’s parents have created a loving environment filled with fun. However, it is clear that their children have not been instructed appropriately in making healthy lifestyle choices.
Honey Boo Boo is famous for her “go-go juice,” which is a mix of Red Bull and Mountain Dew. Yes, that’s right: a seven-year-old is pumped with taurine and sugar to keep her alert enough to perform well during pageants. We also get a glimpse into the food this family eats — “sketti” (spaghetti with a ketchup and butter sauce), cheesy puffs and road kill. They are not very concerned with diseases like E. coli since they let Glitzy, their pet pig, poop on their dining room table.
Manners are another cause for concern, as this concept is foreign to the Thompson/Shannon family. Alana Thompson stated after a session with an etiquette coach that “etiquette classes are for stupid people.” In contrast, the family thinks it is funny to pass gas at the dinner table.
If all these things are not off-putting enough, consider what this show is really doing to Alana in the long run. What is going to happen to her self-esteem when she realizes that there is only so much five pounds of makeup can do? Or, how will she cope with the fact that “redneck-ognize” is not a word?
If the way the Thompson/Shannon family behaves and the food they eat aren’t cause enough for you to never want to watch this show, by all means, watch it. Turn your brain into a wasteland while helping this family make some cash. After all, for Alana Thompson, “a dollah makes [her] hollah Honey Boo Boo.”