Hello loyal reader I won’t embarass you by welcoming you back to school. I’m sure yopu know you’re back at school. I spent the summer loading pipe. I hope you fared better. Much is happening on the news wire. There is craziness in Russia, civic and senatorial elections to deal with at home, and a… Continue reading The Rantings of a news addict
Category: Uncategorized
You should wannabe back
First Assignment: What I Did This SummerAhem! Mrs. Krabappel, fellow classmates:Well, May had arrived, and as usual things weren’t turning out the wayI’d planned. Since I wasn’t living a charmed life, fate eventually decidedI would have to work in the service industry this summer. Not giving upthat easily, I decided if it had to be… Continue reading You should wannabe back
New specimens
By Jan Creaser
Thump! Thump! Thump! "Hello, and welcome to this week’s edition of Wild University. Dr. Brain and I are currently making our way through the University of Calgary Fees Office on an excursion to view an annual phenomenon here on campus. A little history, Dr. Brain?" "Thank you, Professor. The particular migration pattern we are witnessing… Continue reading New specimens
Expansion delayed…again
By Bao Ho
MacEwan Hall expansion has been delayed; again.Construction of the long-awaited expansion building is slated to begin next month. Another setback pushed back the date of the ground breaking from September to October.Students’ Union plans for expansion have been ongoing since 1996 and have suffered numerous delays in that time.“We can only make a rough estimate,… Continue reading Expansion delayed…again
Until there is no student hunger…
By Mary Chan
Wendy:“The first time I walked into the Campus Food Bank I was feeling very beaten. My financial resources and personal energy were down to almost nothing. Very timidly I said, “Uh, hi, I am here to find out about a food hamper, I guess.” I waited for a disapproving look, the “oh you poor thing”… Continue reading Until there is no student hunger…
Would you like fries with that?
By Ben Perrin
Criminal record? No problem! Poor attendance record? No sweat! Qualifications: Must be good golfer, able to toe party line without questions. Salary: Make your own and raise it whenever you like. Apply to: 24 Sussex Drive in person for "Senate patronage appointment ’98." Note: Elected, accountable and representative applicants need not apply. It’s the dream… Continue reading Would you like fries with that?
Vanier shmanier–just gimme the Jug O’ Justice
It was hot. Those without hats or bottled water had only themselves to blame as they jostled for shade under the trees. Everyone on the hill next to the Stampeder’s practice field last Saturday rapidly grew numb to the blazing heat (not to mention the slow creeping wedgie one gets from sitting on an incline),… Continue reading Vanier shmanier–just gimme the Jug O’ Justice
Marching the troops up Vanier Ridge
He sits in the serenity of an unassuming office examining a book meant only for a chosen few. The soft lilt of classical music evokes a sense of calm before the storm. Not unlike a general preparing for war, his confident demeanour cannot hide the fear of the unknown.In one week, his troops will don… Continue reading Marching the troops up Vanier Ridge
How the West will be won
Every November, around Vanier Cup time, a team from the West journeys across the country, licks their lips, and, for lack of a better expression, sticks their paws down the scrawny throats of the East’s highly touted overrated trash and mercilessly rips the ever-loving entrails from their unstable bowels."If it’s not the toughest conference, it’s… Continue reading How the West will be won